We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

T​A​L​L G​L​A​S​S OF M​E​L​A​N​I​N

by Merrell Nesker

/
1.
THESE POLITICIANS WERE FUCKING UP THE COUNTRY OLD RICH WHITE GUYS WHO WERE ONLY LOOKING OUT FOR THEMSELVES KILLING THE POOR, THE BROWN, AND THE DISABLED I HAD TO TAKE THEM OUT THEY NEEDED TO BE ASSASSINATED I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS THE SCUMBAG MILLIONAIRES WERE GATHERED FOR A PHOTO OP AT A MILITARY GRAVEYARD THEY WANTED PEOPLE TO THINK THEY CARED THOSE SOLDIERS WOULD KILL FASCIST SCUM LIKE THEM IN AN INSTANT I WOULD HAVE TO CARRY OUT THAT MISSION MYSELF I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I RAN UP WITH A GLOCK 10mm I SHOT UP ALL TEN OF THOSE DIRTY POLITICIANS AND THEN I PUMPED SOME MURDOCH JOURNALISTS FULL OF LEAD FOR GOOD MEASURE I RAN OUT OF THERE QUICKER THAN O.J. SIMPSON AT A SPORTS SHOP I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS I KILLED TEN POLITICIANS
2.
YOU LOOKING FINE, GIRL PINK HAIR, SLENDER CURVES PASTEL TONE CLOTHES LOOKING LIKE YOU CAME STRAIGHT OUT FROM AN ANIME POCKETS FULL OF SPAGHETTI LUMP IN MY THROAT YOU'RE NOT SO MUCH OUT OF MY LEAGUE AS YOU ARE OUT OF MY REALITY DAMN GIRL, YOU LOOKING FINE LOOKING LIKE YOU CAME STRAGHT OUT FROM AN ANIME DAMN GIRL, YOU LOOKING FINE STEP UP TO THE PLATE, BUTTERFLIES IN MY STOMACH MATES BUGGING ME TO JUST SAY SOMETHING TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD, NEVER TALKED TO A GIRL I WAS ADOPTED AS A CHILD, DISCOVERED ABANDONED IN A BOWL OF SPAGHETTI THE BIGGEST LOSER YOU'LL EVER KNOW IN YOUR LIFE STARING FROM AFAR AT THIS DAMN GIRL LOOKING FINE DAMN GIRL, YOU LOOKING FINE LOOKING LIKE YOU CAME STRAGHT OUT FROM AN ANIME DAMN GIRL, YOU LOOKING FINE DAMN GIRL, YOU LOOKING FINE LOOKING LIKE YOU CAME STRAGHT OUT FROM AN ANIME DAMN GIRL, YOU LOOKING FINE YOU OUT OF MY LEAGUE, GIRL I AIN'T GOTTA BE A MENZA MEMBER TO KNOW THAT THIS WAS A BAD IDEA FROM THE START HOT DAMN GIRL, LOOKING FLYER THAN AN ANIME AESTHETIC FOR DAYS CEL-SHADED CHIC, LA FREAK LONG PINK HAIR FLOWING DOWN TO YOUR KNEES DAMN GIRL, YOU LOOKING FINE LOOKING LIKE YOU CAME STRAGHT OUT FROM AN ANIME DAMN GIRL, YOU LOOKING FINE DAMN GIRL, YOU LOOKING FINE LOOKING LIKE YOU CAME STRAGHT OUT FROM AN ANIME DAMN GIRL, YOU LOOKING FINE LOOKING LIKE YOU CAME STRAGHT OUT FROM AN ANIME
3.
WHY SHOULD I HAVE TO HEAR THESE PEOPLE OUT? WHY WOULD I WANT TO DEBATE WITH SOMEONE WHO WANTS ME DEAD? JUST AS SOME NEO-NAZI SCUMBAG IS FREE TO SPOUT HIS BULLSHIT, I'M FREE TO CALL HIM OUT ON IT DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! PEACEFUL PROTEST ISN'T GETTING US ANYWHERE WHY SHOULD WE JUST STAND AROUND WHILE THEY'RE KILLING US OUT THERE? NON-VIOLENCE ISN'T THE ANSWER ANYMORE WE NEED TO DEFEND OURSELVES AGAINST THOSE WHO WANT US DEAD DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! THE ALT-RIGHT ARE A BUNCH OF TOSSERS THEY JUST DISMISS EVERYTHING RATIONAL AS 'FEELINGS' SAFE SPACES ARE THE NEW SEGREGATION WHEN YOU'RE DONE KILLING OFF THE CANCEROUS RIGHT, GET TO WORK ON THE LEFT TOO DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS! DEATH TO NEO-NAZIS!
4.
SHE IS CURLS AND CURVES AND CONFIDENCE, OH MY! SHE IS THAT DARKNESS THAT ROUGH CUT JEWEL SHE IS THAT BROWN SUGAR THAT SICKLY SWEETNESS THAT'S JUST OH, SO WORTH IT THAT SWING OF THE HIPS THAT KISS FROM HER LIPS SHE'S A TALL GLASS OF MELANIN (drink up) SHE'S A TALL GLASS OF MELANIN (drink up) SHE'S A TALL GLASS OF MELANIN (drink up) THAT GAP BETWEEN HER TEETH THE CHASM THAT DIVIDES US SO SLOW DANCING KEEP HER CLOSE THAT BLACK GIRL MAGIC HEX-A-PLENTY, MELANIN CHARMS THIS WOMAN'S PUT A SPELL ON YOU THAT CAN'T BE BROKE YOU'RE HERS NOW NOW AND FOREVER SHE'S A TALL GLASS OF MELANIN (drink up) SHE'S A TALL GLASS OF MELANIN (drink up) SHE'S A TALL GLASS OF MELANIN (drink up) NUDE BEFORE YOU, FULLY DRESSED HER SOUL, BARED HER FULL GLORY, UNVEILED SUDDENLY, SHE'S YOURS BUT YOU CAN'T HANDLE THIS GODDESS YOU CAN'T HANDLE THAT RICHNESS THOSE CURLS AND CURVES AND THAT CONFIDENCE SHE'S A TALL GLASS OF MELANIN (drink up) SHE'S A TALL GLASS OF MELANIN (drink up) SHE'S A TALL GLASS OF MELANIN (drink up) SHE'S A TALL GLASS OF MELANIN (drink up) SHE'S A TALL GLASS OF MELANIN (drink up) SHE'S A TALL GLASS OF MELANIN (drink up)
5.
TONY BLAIR IS A WAR CRIMINAL HE CALLED FOR THE INVASION OF IRAQ AMERICA WANTED IRAQ'S OIL AND TONY BLAIR BENT OVER BACKWARDS TO GET IT FOR THEM THERE WERE NO WMD'S CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY TONY BLAIR IS TRYING TO MAKE A COMEBACK TO BRITISH POLITICS WELL, WE DON'T WANT YOU BACK, WAR CRIMINAL TAKE ALL THAT MONEY FROM YOUR AFTER-DINNER SPEECHES, BUY A DESERT ISLAND, AND FUCK OFF OR BETTER YET, CHECK INTO A PRISON CELL CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY ONE DAY, YOU AND THAT COCKWONBLE GEORGE BUSH WILL PAY DEARLY FOR YOUR WAR CRIMES WE'LL FIND YOU GUILTY ON ALL COUNTS WE'LL HANG YOU HIGH YOU'LL BE DRAWN AND QUARTERED, MOTHERFUCKERS! CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY
6.
I GOT WIND THAT THERE WAS A CHILD MOLESTER LIVING DOWN THE STREET FROM ME I GOT CHATTING ONLINE WITH HIM WE SET A DATE TO MEET UP TOGETHER WE WERE GONNA MEET IN McDONALDS WHEN HE GOT TO McDONALDS, HE WASN'T GREETED BY A THIRTEEN YEAR OLD GIRL, BUT BY ME AND MY BUDDIES PUSH THAT BULLET THROUGH A PAEDOPHILE'S FACE PUSH THAT BULLET THROUGH A PAEDOPHILE'S FACE PUSH THAT BULLET THROUGH A PAEDOPHILE'S FACE THE NONCE SAT DOWN WTH ME AND MY MATES WE ORDERED A SHITLOAD OF BURGERS AND NUGGETS AND McFLURRIES WE THOUGHT WE'D BE KIND ENOUGH TO GIVE THE NONCE A LAST MEAL BEFORE WE SORTED HIM OUT ONCE WE WERE DONE EATING, WE TOOK HIM OUT BACK I FITTED THE OSPREY SILENCER OVER MY GLOCK 23, AND SHOT HIM IN THE KNEES PUSH THAT BULLET THROUGH A PAEDOPHILE'S FACE PUSH THAT BULLET THROUGH A PAEDOPHILE'S FACE PUSH THAT BULLET THROUGH A PAEDOPHILE'S FACE AFTER I BLEW THE NONCE'S KNEES OUT WITH MY GLOCK 23, WE STARTED KICKING THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF HIM WE SMACKED HIM UP WITH METAL BASEBALL BATS WHEN WE WERE FINISHED BEATING THE PAEDO INTO PASTE, I SHOVED MY GLOCK UP HIS NOSE I BLEW HIS FUCKING BRAINS OUT! PUSH THAT BULLET THROUGH A PAEDOPHILE'S FACE PUSH THAT BULLET THROUGH A PAEDOPHILE'S FACE PUSH THAT BULLET THROUGH A PAEDOPHILE'S FACE PUSH THAT BULLET THROUGH A PAEDOPHILE'S FACE PUSH THAT BULLET THROUGH A PAEDOPHILE'S FACE PUSH THAT BULLET THROUGH A PAEDOPHILE'S FACE PUSH THAT BULLET THROUGH A PAEDOPHILE'S FACE PUSH THAT BULLET THROUGH A PAEDOPHILE'S FACE PUSH THAT BULLET THROUGH A PAEDOPHILE'S FACE PUSH THAT BULLET THROUGH A PAEDOPHILE'S FACE
7.
YOU ARE ONE CRAZY MOTHERFUCKER YOU ARE ONE CRAZY BILLIONAIRE YOU ARE ONE CRAZY SEX CRIMINAL YOU ARE ONE CRAZY PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP THE AMERICAN PEOPLE ELECTED YOU PRESIDENT THE KU KLUX KLAN GAVE YOU A RINGING ENDORSEMENT RACISTS AND RAPISTS FROM ALL OVER THE LAND FLOCKED TO VOTE FOR YOU THEY SEEM TO THINK YOU'LL SOLVE ALL THEIR PROBLEMS DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP YOU SAID YOU WOULD 'MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN' YOU'VE GOT YOUR WORK CUT OUT FOR YOU, MISTER PRESIDENT YOUR WIFE'S AN IMMIGRANT AND YOUR VICE-PRESIDENT'S A BACKWARDS HICK IN THE END, YOU'RE STILL JUST A PUPPET FOR THE ELITE DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP DONALD TRUMP
8.
YOU SOLD ME OUT YOU TURNED ME IN TO THE POLICE AFTER WE ROBBED A BANK YOU GOT OFF SCOT-FREE, WHILE I HAD TO ROT IN PRISON FOR TWENTY YEARS WHILE I WAS IN PRISON, I KNEW ONE THING I KNEW YOU HAD TO DIE, OLD FRIEND I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND AROUND A QUARTER-PAST TEN I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND AROUND A QUARTER-PAST TEN I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND AROUND A QUARTER-PAST TEN TWENTY YEARS LATER, I GOT OUT OF PRISON AS I READJUSTED TO NORMAL LIFE, I WAS FORMULATING MY PLAN TO MURDER YOUR SNEAKY ARSE I FOUND OUT WHERE YOU LIVED I FOUND OUT WHERE YOU WORKED FATE WAS CONSPIRING TO BRING US BACK TOGETHER I WAS CONSPIRING TO RUIN YOUR FAMILY'S DAY WITH A GLOCK IN MY POCKET, I MADE MY WAY TO YOUR FANCY SEMI-DETACHED HOUSE I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND AROUND A QUARTER-PAST TEN I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND AROUND A QUARTER-PAST TEN I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND AROUND A QUARTER-PAST TEN time to die, old friend time to die, old friend AT AROUND 10:15 PM, I KNOCKED ON YOUR DOOR I KNEW YOU'D BE HOME I KNEW YOU GOT HOME FROM WORK ABOUT FOUR HOURS BEFOREHAND AS YOU ANSWERED THE DOOR, I SHOT YOU TWICE IN THE CHEST SUDDENLY, I SHOT YOU TWICE IN THE HEAD BEFORE YOU EVEN HIT THE GROUND JUSTICE WAS DONE YOUR DUMB ARSE FINALLY PAID FOR BETRAYING ME ALL THOSE YEARS AGO I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND AROUND A QUARTER-PAST TEN I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND AROUND A QUARTER-PAST TEN I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND AROUND A QUARTER-PAST TEN I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND AROUND A QUARTER-PAST TEN I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND AROUND A QUARTER-PAST TEN I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND AROUND A QUARTER-PAST TEN I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND AROUND A QUARTER-PAST TEN I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND AROUND A QUARTER-PAST TEN I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND AROUND A QUARTER-PAST TEN
9.
THIS GUY WAS LURKING ON MY TURF I'D NEVER SEEN HIM BEFORE IN MY LIFE I FOLLOWED HIM TO AN ABANDONED HOUSE SUDDENLY, THE MOTHERFUCKER TURNED AROUND AND SHOT ME LIFE IN THE GHETTO LIFE IN THE GHETTO LIFE IN THE GHETTO I RAN FOR MY LIFE WITH A BULLET IN MY ARM I RAN BACK HOME AND WENT TO MY BEDROOM TO CLEAN UP AS I TRIED TO GO TO SLEEP, THE SAME MOTHERFUCKER CLIMBED THROUGH MY WINDOW HE TOLD ME 'SCREAM AND YOU'RE DEAD' LIFE IN THE GHETTO LIFE IN THE GHETTO LIFE IN THE GHETTO LIFE IN THE GHETTO LIFE IN THE GHETTO LIFE IN THE GHETTO I GRABBED THE GUN OFF THE MOTHERFUCKER THE BLOODLUST OVERCAME ME I SHOT HIM TWICE IN THE LEGS, AND TWICE IN THE CHEST AS HE CRAWLED TOWARDS MY BEDROOM DOOR, I SHOT HIM FIVE TIMES IN THE MOTHERFUCKING HEAD LIFE IN THE GHETTO LIFE IN THE GHETTO LIFE IN THE GHETTO LIFE IN THE GHETTO LIFE IN THE GHETTO LIFE IN THE GHETTO LIFE IN THE GHETTO LIFE IN THE GHETTO LIFE IN THE GHETTO
10.
THIS GUY WAS CHASING ME THROUGH THE STREETS HE WAS SPEAKING IN TONGUES WHILE WAVING A MACHETE THIS GUY WAS LOOKING TO KILL ME HE WANTED TO CHOP ME UP AND DRINK MY BLOOD I DUCKED INTO AN ALLEYWAY JUST WHEN I THOUGHT I WAS SAFE, THIS MOTHERFUCKER POPPED RIGHT UP IN MY FACE HE WAS SCREAMING LIKE A FUCKING MANIAC PSYCHO KILLER SCREAM! PSYCHO KILLER SCREAM! PSYCHO KILLER SCREAM! AS I RAN UP A FIRE ESCAPE, THE CRAZY MOTHERFUCKER CHASED AFTER ME HE SLASHED ME IN THE BACK WITH HIS MACHETE I RAN ALL THE WAY UP TO THE ROOFTOP I PICKED UP A BRICK AND THREW IT AT THE MOTHERFUCKER'S THICK HEAD AS THE BRICK SMASHED HIM IN THE HEAD, THE CRAZY CUNT STAGGERED TOWARDS THE EDGE HE WENT OVER THE ROOF, SCREAMING LIKE A WILD ANIMAL AS HE FELL PSYCHO KILLER SCREAM! PSYCHO KILLER SCREAM! PSYCHO KILLER SCREAM! psycho killer scream psycho killer scream psycho killer scream I RAN BACK DOWN THE FIRE ESCAPE THE MOTHERFUCKER WAS ALL CRUMPLED UP ON THE CONCRETE PSYCHO KILLING CRAZY MOTHERFUCKER WAS STREET PIZZA SUDDENLY, HE STARTED LAUGHING AND SPRANG BACK UP TO ATTACK ME HE WAS CLAWING AT MY FACE AND ARMS I PUNCHED THE PSYCHO KILLER'S LIGHTS OUT THEN I STAMPED ON HIS HEAD A FEW HUNDRED TIMES UNTIL HE WAS DEAD PSYCHO KILLER SCREAM! PSYCHO KILLER SCREAM! PSYCHO KILLER SCREAM! PSYCHO KILLER SCREAM! PSYCHO KILLER SCREAM! PSYCHO KILLER SCREAM! psycho killer scream psycho killer scream psycho killer scream
11.
YOU'VE BEEN RUNNING AROUND UNCHECKED FOR TOO LONG NOW IT'S TIME SOMEBODY PUT YOU IN YOUR PLACE IT'S TIME SOMEBODY TOOK YOU DOWN A PEG YOU GOTTA DIE, YOU MOTHERFUCKER! TIME TO DIE, MOTHERFUCKER! TIME TO DIE, MOTHERFUCKER! TIME TO DIE, MOTHERFUCKER! YOU'RE A MANIAC YOU'RE A DISEASED CRIMINAL YOU'VE RUINED FAR TOO MANY LIVES I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU, HUMAN TRASH! WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO WRITE ON YOUR TOMBSTONE? TIME TO DIE, MOTHERFUCKER! TIME TO DIE, MOTHERFUCKER! TIME TO DIE, MOTHERFUCKER! YOU DESERVE EVERYTHING YOU GET FOR YOUR DESPICABLE CRIMES YOU'RE AN IRREDEEMABLE CUNT WHEN I FINALLY BLEW YOUR FUCKING BRAINS OUT, YOU LAUGHED LIKE A FUCKING LOON TIME TO DIE, MOTHERFUCKER! TIME TO DIE, MOTHERFUCKER! TIME TO DIE, MOTHERFUCKER! TIME TO DIE, MOTHERFUCKER! TIME TO DIE, MOTHERFUCKER! TIME TO DIE, MOTHERFUCKER!
12.
I DRANK A WHOLE LOT OF BEER LAST NIGHT! I DRANK SO MUCH CIDER I DRANK SO MUCH WHISKEY I WAS STILL KINDA DRUNK WHEN I WOKE UP THE NEXT MORNING I DRANK SOME WATER TO CLEANSE MY PALATE, THEN I DIVED RIGHT BACK INTO THE BOOZE HAIR OF THE DOG HAIR OF THE DOG HAIR OF THE DOG I HAD A SPARE BOTTLE OF COKE I EMPTIED MOST OF IT OUT AND REPLACED IT WITH WHISKEY I NEEDED TO KEEP THE BUZZ GOING IF I WAS GONNA GET THROUGH THE DAY ONCE I'D GOTTEN ALL OF MY CHORES DONE, I DECIDED TO GO DOWN TO THE PUB I ORDERED TWO PINTS OF FRONTIER LAGER HAIR OF THE DOG HAIR OF THE DOG HAIR OF THE DOG hair of the dog hair of the dog hair of the dog THE NEXT DAY, I BOUGHT TWO MASSIVE BOTTLES OF CIDER I JUST WANTED TO KEEP THE BUZZ GOING I JUST DIDN'T GIVE A SHIT I BOUGHT A CRAPLOAD OF FRIED CHICKEN FROM KFC I SAT DOWN WITH MY CIDER AND GOT DRUNK AND FAT AND FUCKED UP FOR THE REST OF THE DAY HAIR OF THE DOG HAIR OF THE DOG HAIR OF THE DOG HAIR OF THE DOG HAIR OF THE DOG HAIR OF THE DOG hair of the dog
13.
THE CRINGE IS TOO STRONG! YOU'RE GETTING OFFENDED OVER THE MOST MEANINGLESS BULLSHIT YOU'RE APPROPRIATING OTHERS' STRUGGLES JUST SO YOU CAN FEEL SUPERIOR FUCK YOU! PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER IF YOU KEEP IT UP WITH ALL THIS SAFE SPACE BULLSHIT, YOU'RE GOING TO END UP SEGREGATING EVERYBODY WHEN THE HELL DID THE LEFT BECOME SO FUCKING REPRESSED? YOU'RE SETTING MARGINALISED GROUPS AGAINST EACH OTHER ALL BECAUSE OF YOUR WHITE GUILT PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER YOU'RE JUST PLAYING INTO THE HANDS OF CONSERVATIVES AND NEO-NAZIS ALIKE! THEY'RE JUST DOING THEIR THING WHILE YOU IDIOTS ARE MAKING FOOLS OF YOURSELVES WE NEED TO GET BACK TO STANDING UP FOR THE OPPRESSED WE NEED TO FIGHT THE REAL ENEMY- THE ELITE PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER
14.
TOMMY TUCKER WAS A YOUNG HOMELESS MAN HIS PARENTS WERE THE BIGGEST PIECES OF SHIT YOU COULD EVER KNOW TOMMY FELT HE WAS SAFER OUT ON THE STREETS THAN IN HIS OWN HOME TOMMY WAS SLEEPING ROUGH ON AN INDUSTRIAL ESTATE WHEN ONE NIGHT, HE CAUGHT SIGHT OF A COUPLE OF BLOKES RUNNING OUT OF THE PRINTING PRESS THEY'D ROBBED THE PLACE, AND KILLED THE OWNER THIS IS THE LIFE AND TIMES OF TOMMY TUCKER THIS IS THE LIFE AND TIMES OF TOMMY TUCKER THIS IS THE LIFE AND TIMES OF TOMMY TUCKER THE TWO CUNTS THAT ROBBED THE PRINTING PRESS WEREN'T EVEN WEARING MASKS OR ANYTHING THEY SPLIT UP, ONE RUNNING ONE WAY, THE OTHER RUNNING PAST TOMMY THE ROBBERY WAS ALL OVER THE PAPERS THERE WAS A BIG FUCKING REWARD FOR THE TWO CROOKS A FEW WEEKS LATER, TOMMY WAS OUT ON THE PAVEMENT WALKING TOWARDS HIM, WAS THE SAME GUY TOMMY SAW ROBBING THE PRINTING PRESS AND MURDERING ITS OWNER THIS IS THE LIFE AND TIMES OF TOMMY TUCKER THIS IS THE LIFE AND TIMES OF TOMMY TUCKER THIS IS THE LIFE AND TIMES OF TOMMY TUCKER THIS IS THE LIFE AND TIMES OF TOMMY TUCKER THIS IS THE LIFE AND TIMES OF TOMMY TUCKER THIS IS THE LIFE AND TIMES OF TOMMY TUCKER crime pays crime pays crime pays AS SOON AS TOMMY SAW THAT ONE CROOK, HE RAN FOR HIS FUCKING LIFE! THE GUY RAN AFTER HIM DUCKING INTO AN ALLEY, TOMMY TUCKER THOUGHT HE WAS SAFE SUDDENLY, TOMMY WAS PUNCHED TO THE GROUND BY THE PRINTING PRESS ROBBER THIS GUY BEAT THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF TOMMY HE BROKE TOMMY'S FINGERS, AND PULLED OUT HIS TEETH JUST WHEN TOMMY THOUGHT THE PAIN WOULD NEVER END, THE ROBBER PULLED OUT A SNUB NOSED REVOLVER HE BLEW TOMMY TUCKER'S BRAIN'S OUT THIS IS THE LIFE AND TIMES OF TOMMY TUCKER THIS IS THE LIFE AND TIMES OF TOMMY TUCKER THIS IS THE LIFE AND TIMES OF TOMMY TUCKER THIS IS THE LIFE AND DEATH OF TOMMY TUCKER THIS IS THE LIFE AND DEATH OF TOMMY TUCKER THIS IS THE LIFE AND DEATH OF TOMMY TUCKER
15.
LAST WEEK, I CAUGHT WIND OF A PAEDOPHILE RING OPERATING IN MY TOWN I HAD TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT I WENT DOWN TO THE PARK I CAUGHT ONE OF THEM TRYING TO CHAT UP A THIRTEEN YEAR OLD GIRL I BEAT HIS ARSE UP I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I BROUGHT THE FUCKING NONCE TO MY HIDEOUT ME AND MY MATES TORTURED HIM FOR INFORMATION ON THE PAEDOPHILE RING WE MADE HIM TELL US EVERYTHING ABOUT IT HE TOLD US THEY WERE GONNA HAVE A MEETING AT HIS HOUSE ON FRIDAY NIGHT I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES FRIDAY NIGHT, WE ROCKED UP TO THE PAEDOPHILES' MEETING ME AND MY MATES CAME AT THE DIRTY NONCES WITH KNIVES AND CLAW HAMMERS WE CUT 'EM UP, WE BEAT 'EM UP, THEN WE SET THEM ALIGHT WE BURNED THAT NONCE SHACK TO THE GROUND! I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES I MURDERED A GANG OF PAEDOPHILES
16.
YOU NEVER FAIL TO INSPIRE ME YOU ARE MY MUSE YOU ARE MY BIG INSPIRATION YOU ARE THE SMOOTHEST OPERATOR YOU ARE THE COOLEST GIRL I KNOW HOLLY BERRY HOLLY BERRY YOU INSPIRE ME LIKE NO OTHER YOU MAKE ME WANNA DO BETTER MAKE ME WANNA BE BETTER YOU'RE AN AWESOME HUMAN BEING AND I CAN ONLY HOPE MY SILLY PAINTINGS DO YOU JUSTICE HOLLY BERRY HOLLY BERRY YOUR BEAUTY, YOUR BRAINS YOUR TAKE-NO-SHIT ATTITUDE YOU DIDN'T JUST MAKE ME A BETTER ARTIST I LIKE TO THINK, YOU MADE ME A BETTER PERSON TOO I LOVE YOU, HOLLY BERRY (in like, a totally platonic way. i don't have time for catching feelings now, i've got an album to finish) HOLLY BERRY HOLLY BERRY HOLLY BERRY HOLLY BERRY
17.
I'M THE GUY WHO SUCKS THE BLUD OF THE VAMPYRE I'M THE GUY WHO FUCKING FUCKS THEM UP I'M THE GUY WHO MAKES THE MONSTERS BEG FOR THEIR MUMMIES I'M THE NIGHTMARE'S NIGHTMARE! I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I KILL THE VAMPYRES I SOAK THE BASTARDS IN HOLY WATER AND STAKE THEM THROUGH THEIR COLD DEAD HEARTS AFTER THAT, THEY CRUMBLE TO DUST THEIR DUSTY REMAINS SCATTER TO THE FOUR WINDS I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA vampyre killer vampyre killer vampyre killer vampyre killer I BEAT THEM ROUND THE HEAD WITH GARLIC BAGUETTES I STUFF GARLIC DOWN THE VAMPYRES' THROATS I LISTEN TO THEM BEGGING FOR THEIR UNLIVES I LAUGH IN THEIR FACES I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA I'M THE VAMPYRE KILLA
18.
THIS CITY'LL WEAR YOU DOWN, SON YOU'RE A BIG FUCKING CLIFF, AND THE CITY'S THE SEA ERODING YOU YEAR BY YEAR YOU WON'T SEE IT COMING YOU WON'T KNOW IT'S THE END UNTIL YOU FINALLY BREAK BECAUSE IN THE END, THE CITY TAKES ALL PICK YOURSELF UP, YOU'RE DOING FINE, SON PICK YOURSELF UP, YOU'RE DOING FINE, SON PICK YOURSELF UP, YOU'RE DOING FINE, SON THIS CITY NEEDS PEOPLE LIKE YOU THE CITY NEEDS TO FEED IT'S NOT ENOUGH TO HAVE YOU INSIDE IT THE CITY'S GOTTA CONSUME YOU TOO IT'LL CHEW YOU UP, SPIT YOU OUT YOU'LL LOOK INTO THE MIRROR AND YOU WON'T EVEN RECOGNISE YOURSELF remember who you are PICK YOURSELF UP, YOU'RE DOING FINE, SON PICK YOURSELF UP, YOU'RE DOING FINE, SON PICK YOURSELF UP, YOU'RE DOING FINE, SON PICK YOURSELF UP, YOU'RE DOING FINE, SON THIS CITY'S A VAMPYRE, IT LIVES TO CONSUME MAN, WOMAN, CHILD, IT'S JUST ANOTHER MEAL WHEN ALL IS SAID AND DONE, THE CITY WILL GO ON EVEN YOU, FOR ALL YOUR TRYING, WILL NOT LIVE ON IN THE HEARTS OF OTHERS YOU'LL BE FORGOTTEN JUST ANOTHER CLIFF FACE, WORN DOWN BY THE IMMORTAL SEA PICK YOURSELF UP, YOU'RE DOING FINE, SON PICK YOURSELF UP, YOU'RE DOING FINE, SON PICK YOURSELF UP, YOU'RE DOING FINE, SON PICK YOURSELF UP, YOU'RE DOING FINE, SON PICK YOURSELF UP, YOU'RE DOING FINE, SON PICK YOURSELF UP, YOU'RE DOING FINE, SON
19.
I WAS SENTENCED TO FIFTY YEARS IN PRISON FOR KILLING FIVE PAEDOPHILES THE PAEDO'S FRIENDS KNEW SOME WELL-CONNECTED PEOPLE THEY PUT ME IN THE SEX OFFENDERS WING THE DIRTY NONCES WERE LOOKING TO KILL ME ROTTING AWAY IN PRISON ROTTING AWAY IN PRISON ROTTING AWAY IN PRISON ROTTING AWAY IN PRISON ROTTING AWAY IN PRISON ROTTING AWAY IN PRISON THE PAEDOS ALL TRIED TO TAKE A SHOT AT ME THEY WERE PISSED OFF THAT I'D KILLED SO MANY OF THEIR FRIENDS I WAS PISSED OFF THAT THEY'D RUINED SO MANY CHILDRENS' LIVES I TORE OUT A PAEDO'S THROAT WITH MY TEETH AFTER THE DIRTY NONCE TRIED TO SHANK ME ROTTING AWAY IN PRISON ROTTING AWAY IN PRISON ROTTING AWAY IN PRISON ROTTING AWAY IN PRISON ROTTING AWAY IN PRISON ROTTING AWAY IN PRISON rotting away in prison rotting away in prison THE WARDEN HAD ME PLACED IN SOLITARY CONFINEMENT A WEEK LATER, I WAS RELEASED FROM SOLITARY AND GIVEN A MACHINE GUN, AMMO, AND TWO AXES THEY LET ME RUN RIOT IN THE SEX OFFENDERS WING THEY LET ME KILL ALL THE DIRTY PAEDOS THAT HAD TRIED TO KILL ME I MADE THEM SUFFER I MADE THEM SCREAM I MADE THEM BEG FOR MERCY I WAS SOAKED FROM HEAD TO TOE IN PAEDOPHILE BLOOD WHEN I WAS FINISHED I WAS RELEASED FROM PRISON FOR GOOD BEHAVIOUR!
20.
YOU HAVE BEEN MY MUSE SINCE OUR DAYS AT BROMLEY COLLEGE YOU HAVE BEEN MY INSPIRATION FROM THE VERY BEGINNING YOU HAVE BEEN THE BEST FRIEND I COULD ASK FOR YOU ARE THE ABSOLUTE PLEASURE TO PAINT YOU ARE THE ABSOLUTE BEST TO TALK TO YOU ARE THE SHARMALLAMA SHARMIN SHARMIN SHARMIN YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL, INSIDE AND OUT YOU ARE TOO COOL AND AWESOME YOU ARE THE KINDEST YOU ARE THE GREATEST YOU HAVE THE BRIGHTEST SMILE YOU HAVE THE KINDEST EYES YOU ARE THE ABSOLUTE BEST FRIEND I'VE GOT YOU ARE THE ABSOLUTE BEST ART THAT I'VE MADE SHARMIN SHARMIN SHARMIN YOU ARE MY MUSE I HOPE TO DRAW AND PAINT YOUR AMAZING SELF FOR YEARS TO COME YOU ARE THE SMARTEST YOU ARE THE COOLEST YOU ARE THE PRETTIEST YOU ARE A STYLISH, WITTY HUMAN BEING IT IS MY PLEASURE TO KNOW EVERYBODY SHOULD HAVE A FRIEND LIKE YOU, SHARMALLAMA SHARMIN SHARMIN SHARMIN SHARMIN SHARMIN SHARMIN
21.
22.
I WAS RUNNING AWAY FROM THE GRIM REAPER HE WANTED TO CLAIM ME BEFORE MY TIME I WASN'T HAVING ANY OF IT THIS GUY WAS PSYCHOTIC HE WAS OBSESSED WITH TAKING ME TO THE UNDERWORLD I HAD NO CHOICE I HAD TO FIGHT DEATH HIMSELF IN MORTAL COMBAT THE GRIM REAPER HAD HIS SCYTHE I CHOSE MY GRANDPA'S SAMURAI SWORD FUCK OFF BACK TO HELL, GRIM REAPER FUCK OFF BACK TO HELL, GRIM REAPER FUCK OFF BACK TO HELL, GRIM REAPER THE BATTLE BEGAN I KICKED DEATH'S ARSE UP AND DOWN THE BATTLEFIELD HE TRIED TO PUT UP A HALF-DECENT FIGHT, BUT THE GRIM REAPER WAS NO MATCH FOR MY SICK SWORDFIGHTING SKILLZ I KNOCKED THE SCYTHE FROM HIS GRIP HE TRIED TO STRAIGHT-UP RIP THE SOUL FROM MY BODY I SMACKED HIM OVER THE HEAD, AND STARTED KICKING THE SHIT OUT OF HIM AS HE WENT DOWN SUDDENLY, I RAN DEATH THROUGH WITH MY KATANA FUCK OFF BACK TO HELL, GRIM REAPER FUCK OFF BACK TO HELL, GRIM REAPER FUCK OFF BACK TO HELL, GRIM REAPER I KILLED THE GRIM REAPER SUDDENLY, A MASSIVE DARK NIGHTMARE MONSTER APPEARED BEFORE ME HE WAS THE TRUE DEATH, THE END OF ALL THINGS HE TOOK THE FALLEN REAPER IN HIS CLAWS, AND ATE HIM UP WHOLE HE SAID THERE'D BE ANOTHER ONE COMING TO TAKE HIS PLACE HE TOLD ME TO WATCH MY BACK, BECAUSE EVEN THOUGH MY TIME HADN'T COME, IT WOULD COME, AND SOONER THAN I WOULD THINK FUCK OFF BACK TO HELL, GRIM REAPER FUCK OFF BACK TO HELL, GRIM REAPER FUCK OFF BACK TO HELL, GRIM REAPER FUCK OFF BACK TO HELL, GRIM REAPER FUCK OFF BACK TO HELL, GRIM REAPER FUCK OFF BACK TO HELL, GRIM REAPER FUCK OFF BACK TO HELL, GRIM REAPER FUCK OFF BACK TO HELL, GRIM REAPER FUCK OFF BACK TO HELL, GRIM REAPER
23.
KICK THAT PAEDO OUT OF HIS HOUSE COME AT HIM WITH PITCHFORKS AND FIRE CHASE HIM UNTIL HE COLLAPSES FROM EXHAUSTION STOMP HIM INTO THE FUCKING DIRT! KILL THAT PAEDO! KILL THAT PAEDO! PULL HIS FUCKING TEETH OUT STOMP ON HIS STOMACH TILL HE SHITS HIMSELF BREAK EVERY BONE IN HIS BODY CUT HIS FINGERS OFF HANG, DRAW, AND QUARTER THE FUCKING NONCE! KILL THAT PAEDO! KILL THAT PAEDO! BURN THE PAEDO'S BODY THROW IT ON A BONFIRE DANCE UNTIL THE BREAK OF DAWN DANCE LIKE FUCKING SAVAGES! KILL THAT PAEDO! KILL THAT PAEDO! KILL THAT PAEDO! KILL THAT PAEDO!
24.
WRAPPED AROUND HER RIGHT ARM, THE TAIL OF A DRAGON TAKING PRIDE OF PLACE ON HER BEAUTIFUL BACK HER LEFT ARM, AN EXQUISITE SLEEVE OF MEXICANA SUGAR SKULLS DAY OF THE DEAD AN ELEGANT CANVAS THE MOST BRILLIANT ARTWORK YOU'VE EVER SEEN IN YOUR LIFE I'M IN LOVE WITH THE GIRL WITH THE TATTOOED ARMS I'M IN LOVE WITH THE GIRL WITH THE TATTOOED ARMS I'M IN LOVE WITH THE GIRL WITH THE TATTOOED ARMS SHE'S A CERTIFIED SWEET-TALKER MOUTH LIKE A SAILOR SEPTUM PIERCING, DIP-DYED BLUE-ON-BLONDE SHE HAS THE DIRTIEST LAUGH YOU EVER HEARD FRECKLES ALL OVER, FROM HEAD TO TOE BETRAYING HER PAST LIFE AS A REDHEAD HAIR SO FRIZZY, WAKING BEDHEAD I'M IN LOVE WITH THE GIRL WITH THE TATTOOED ARMS I'M IN LOVE WITH THE GIRL WITH THE TATTOOED ARMS I'M IN LOVE WITH THE GIRL WITH THE TATTOOED ARMS got me trying every time got me trying every time got me trying every time got me trying every time FACETY LITTLE LADY 5'9", MAKING GANG SIGNS ALL THE WHILE, SPINNING ALL THE BOYS ROUND HER PINKY FINGERS CERTIFIED SWEET-TALKER SHE'S GOT ME BUYING EVERY LINE, EVERY TIME GOT ME TRYING EVERY TIME got me trying every time I'M IN LOVE WITH THE GIRL WITH THE TATTOOED ARMS I'M IN LOVE WITH THE GIRL WITH THE TATTOOED ARMS I'M IN LOVE WITH THE GIRL WITH THE TATTOOED ARMS I'M IN LOVE WITH THE GIRL WITH THE TATTOOED ARMS I'M IN LOVE WITH THE GIRL WITH THE TATTOOED ARMS I'M IN LOVE WITH THE GIRL WITH THE TATTOOED ARMS

credits

released December 31, 2016

Track 1 first published October 14th 2016

Track 10 contains elements from PSYCHO KILLER SCREAM, from the EP KILL THAT DEMON WITH HEAVENFIRE!; published May 6th 2016

Track 12 contains elements from HAIR OF THE DOG, from the EP GOD WILL EAT US; published April 10th 2016

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Elbie Press Bromley, UK

Autistic beatmaker, the biggest fucking cheese in the universe, I draw cool girls, that's about it.

contact / help

Contact Elbie Press

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Report this album or account

Elbie Press recommends:

If you like TALL GLASS OF MELANIN, you may also like: